I am almost afraid to put this out there.
If you began reading this blog in the early days….you know that it began because I wanted to “get back in control”, find the fit version of myself again, feel better, lose weight, and …I guess just feel better in my own skin again.
I began with increasing my exercise regimen and maintaining better consistency with it and going on a strict calorie restricted diet.
The results were both “successful” and disastrous. I induced a round of relatively severe depression that reminded me of my teen years, a level of depression over a longer time period that I have not experienced in a long time, despite the “success” on the scale and “feeling good” about my weight.
Anyway, based on my research, I know/believe that the disastrous part of my diet was due to severe fat deprivation (best way to reduce calories is to cut out the fat-or so I thought).
So….here goes. A personal experiment and terrifying proposition, let me just flip what I did on it’s head and see how that goes? *note- I make it sound like a willy-nilly, uneducated idea but I actually did serious reading and research and made a well thought out decision….I hope?
What I am about to do:
1. I will STOP weighing myself for 3 months. Just saying that scares me. Like, nail biting, white-knuckled, I don’t know if I can do that, addiction level fear.
And that’s exactly why I should do it. After 3 months, I will have to decide to weigh or not weigh…and I am genuinely curious about how I feel when it comes time.
Instead, I will measure the success of this new…plan, by how it makes me feel. How does my body feel? Energized, tired, good, yucky? How does my mind feel? Negative, positive, happy, sad, calm, anxious, relaxed, upbeat, depressed?
And, I will judge my “weight loss” by how my body feels in my clothes, how my muscles show or don’t show. I would say how it looks, but I have a wee problem there. I see myself in a disordered way, so judging that way is potentially a slippery slope. I don’t want to start a new obsession standing naked in front of a mirror analyzing each part…that’s even more disordered than standing naked on a scale staring at a number.
2. I will NOT count calories. Again….kind of scares me. But, did you know the “calorie count” of foods has absolutely ZERO relative accuracy to how the body metabolizes and uses the energy stored in food? For example: 5 different foods can be “200 calories” and all 5 have a different level of actual cellular energy created when digested and metabolized in the body. Is it possible that the entire idea of a calorie as we know it….is stupid? Maybe.
I will (Again, this is based on sound research not just a wild hair of an idea):
*eat as much healthy fats as I feel like and make a point to eat a lot more than what I have been doing. No, I will not make Keto balls of coconut oil and butter…that is a bit silly in my opinion.
>healthy fats = organic and/or grass fed butter, coconut oil and coconut cream(hello Thai curry, here I come!), extra virgin olive oil(but never heated, used raw), nuts, cheese, avocado, and eggs (I do love eggs, eggs are yummy).
I will generally avoid all other vegetable oils and spreads, especially the highly toxic heated versions. Say goodbye to all commercially fried foods (don’t like em anyway), and all products with soybean oil (almost anything in a package that isn’t an even more toxic non-fat product). Note: I’ve noticed that soybean oil makes me feel sick…for good reason. I suggest you do your research on soybean oil….and then avoid it.
*I will avoid sugar and grain products. Not exactly low carb, but very close to it. I will eat some beans and limited fruit (So that’s why technically not low carb).
*I will continue to enjoy unlimited veg. I love veggies and think they are the one food no one has ever demonized.
So….universally accepted as healthy eats.
Gotta say, I’m looking forward to a handful (or several) of nuts and some cheese when I’m hungry and need a snack.
*I will eat as much or as little meat as I want, and eat meats I enjoy. I will NOT eat ground turkey and chicken breasts instead of beef, if beef is what I want to eat. I will eat ground turkey or chicken when and if that’s what I want to eat. I will still avoid processed meats due to their toxic nature, and I find them yucky anyway.
>I will continue to seek out organic and grass fed versions, for obvious reasons.
*I will eat when hungry, stop when not hungry. I will NOT eat dinner if I’m not hungry just because I am supposed to eat dinner. If I’m hungry, I will eat. If I’m not hungry, I won’t eat. If I’m satiated, I will stop eating even if there’s still food on my plate.
*I will avoid alcohol.
*I will have a weekend night where I “just don’t worry about it” and eat or drink whatever I feel like, nobody likes feeling deprived. And, if I crave pasta all week, it is easier to tell myself I will wait for Friday than to tell myself I can’t eat pasta. Same goes for a jelly doughnut (truth- haven’t had or wanted one of those is years, but I do love a good chocolate old-fashioned once in while).
3. I will continue to exercise most days and include a lot more muscle building more consistently. I will still run, but I won’t necessarily push for miles. I will explore and enjoy other activities that keep me active but aren’t formal exercise.
4. I will keep a daily log of how it’s going. Food/activity record plus how I feel each day-mostly for research purposes. I want to observe any possible relationships between my eating and activities and how I feel both physically and mentally.
5. I will reserve one day each weekend for complete rest. No yard work, significant housework, workout….etc. real physical rest.
*I will do initial weight and body measurements, just so I have the option to quantify results after 3 months. After today/tomorrow I will refrain from weighing or measuring until November 1st.